The World of Pern(tm) is copyright to Anne McCaffrey (c) l967. The Dragonriders of Pern(r) is a registered copyright. This is a log of roleplay on PernMUSH, available online by permission of Anne McCaffrey, author of the Pern novels, and recorded by A.S. Korra'ti (piper@murkworks.net), player of Mehlani of Telgar Weyr on PernMUSH. This log may be distributed freely as long as this header remains intact. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Log Date: 7/22, 7/28, 7/29/98 Log Cast: Jorenan, Mehlani Log Intro: Mehlani's life has come to something of a crisis point, as the Baker Jorenan has confessed to her that he is in love with her -- and made Mehlani realize that she cannot in good conscience choose yet between him and brownrider K'star, not without talking with Kes. And so, 'Lani has been in a veritable agony of anxiety as she searches the Weyr up and down for the busy dragonrider -- while avoiding, along with most of the rest of the Weyr, that same dragonrider's cousin. For lo, Kassima's green dragon Lysseth is proddy, and a proddy Kassima is a terrible sight to behold. Enough that in Mehlani's case she's taken fleeing as the better part of valor and has spent most of the day looking after her horse. But even the Weyr's meadow isn't really far enough to get away from the effects of a dragonflight, or far enough away to avoid at least one of the young men who seek her heart... ---------- Your location's current time: 21:52 on day 16, month 9, Turn 23, of the Tenth Pass. It is a autumn evening. Jorenan opens the gate and enters from the central bowl, closing it behind him. Jorenan has arrived. Jorenan is watching above at least as much as he's watching where he's going. Not too far away from the entrance to the beasthold, Mehlani has hold of the reins of Nightsong, who is clearly skittish, settling down from what might have been an earlier panic. The black mare's in something of a sweat, her demeanor agitated; her ebon head tosses up and down and she paws a front hoof at the earth as 'Lani, at her side, murmurs soothing nonsense to her over and over. The girl's pointedly avoiding looking skyward. Jorenan trips over something or other enough to make him look where he's going instead of the sky. He notes Mehlani's presence, glances skyward once, and then continues on. There was a hesitation there, as if perhaps he realizes a danger but doesn't want to admit it. He strolls towards Mehlani relaxedly. As he gets loser, it becomes apparent that he's got klah and a snack with him. Nightsong whinnies, her dark gaze swinging around in Jorenan's direction. "Shhhh, shhhh now," murmurs Mehlani to her mare, turning her own head around. But the runner does stop pawing at the ground beneath her hooves, and Mehlani gives a wisp of a smile to the approaching Journeyman, her features tired, a bit of sweat on her brow beneath the brim of her ever-present hat. Jorenan considers the look of the two. As he approaches, he makes calming noises at the runner. Perhaps they'll work on the girl, too. "You look," he says, "As if you've had quite a ride." "She saw the dragons blooding," murmurs Mehlani tiredly. He grimaces, and then glances skyward again. He says a quiet "Aye." When he's gotten close, he reaches up and holds a hand out to the runner. There is an apple core in his hand; a remnant of his snack. The nervous mare blows out once through her flared nostrils, then seems to start and realize that Jorenan has offered her something Good. Grudgingly, she accepts the core, nipping it swiftly out of his hand and crunching down upon it. It's enough to make her stand still, and Mehlani's gaze turns grateful. "Thank you," she tells the Baker. Jorenan grins. "Good thing I just finished that," he says. He gives the runner a bit more petting, and then lowers his hands. He glances at Melhlani sidelong and the grin goes a bit more ... something. Shy, perhaps? Speculative? Curious? It's hard to say exactly what. Both Mehlani's hands occupy themselves with stroking Nightsong's black muzzle, and the mare lowers her head as she finishes off the treat, now getting her breath back, calming down. Mehlani peeks back at Jorenan, and after an uncertain, momentary pause, she asks timidly, "Were you... looking for me?" Jorenan considers that. Not whether he was looking for Mehlani, for he was. But maybe whether he shuld admit it or not. "I was... hoping I'd see you," he finally says. This seems to please her; a smile creeps across her mouth. "I've been out here much of the day," she offers softly. She considers, then plaintively appends, "Kassima is awfully... vehement when Lysseth is rising...!" Jorenan ahs. "That would explain why you weren't in the records room." Does that imply he was looking for her there? Well, probably. "Aye," he says about Kassi. "I saw her on her way out to the feeding grounds. She looked rather annoyed." He glances upwards and adds, "She'll probably be calmer soon." Mehlani peeks up skyward, then solemnly nods, breathing out a hopeful "Yes..." Jorenan asks, curiously, "Can you feel it? The flight, that is?" Her gaze still lifted up, Mehlani gives another nod, this one slower. She gravely answers, "A... little. Not as much as a gold flight... not as bad as it was when I-I was a little younger...!" He nods slowly. "You've learned to ignore it, then? I ..." He glances up and pauses for a moment. "I can hear it, but I can't always shut it out. It's like cupping your hands over your ears, but only some of the time." Mehlani's gaze comes back down, and she blushes, though it's harder to tell out here in the darkness than it might be inside, in a glow-lit cavern. She tries to hide her blush by turning her face towards her runner, and as if Nightsong's momentarily flickering ear is entirely fascinating, she stares at it for a while. "I... can't quite ignore it," she admits tinily. Jorenan reaches out and puts a hand on Mehlani's arm, encouraging her to turn back towards him. "No shame in that," he says. Since he's standing close enough to feed the runner fruit cores, he's fairly close to Mehlani, too. Not quite close enough to smell her hair, but he can pretend. Mehlani looks up, her hands still gently stroking her runner's coat, though they pause at Jorenan's contact. She smiles, just a little, and bobs her head to show that she knows. "I'm like my father that way," she murmurs. Jorenan purses his lips and nods, filing away that bit of information for later contemplation. "He's survivd with it for a long while, then. It won't hurt you any." He doesn't let go, and seems tempted to draw her closer. A little flutter seems to cross Mehlani's throat, and she bobs her head slowly, as she peeks at Jorenan out from under her hat brim. "I... know that," she whispers. Jorenan shakes his head slowly, maybe at something he sees in the dimly lit face peering out from under the hat. A quiet click of the tongue could signify any number of things. He gives her arm a gentle squeeze and lets it go. "If I touch you, you tremble," he says. "Are you afraid?" Perhaps she's not really trembling, and he's exagerrating. But the idea's right. Perhaps, for she ducks her gaze, and swiftly; it takes her a few moments before she whispers out huskily, "Y... yes..." "Ah," he replies. Then, his shoulders rise in the way that means he's considering saying more, taking the breath to do it, and then letting it out again. Never a harper around to train him to breathe properly, and Ofira never seemed to care. Finally, he says, "Come on in. The water's fine. Da used to say that when we went swimming in the spring. Mighty cold, that spring, but great once we were in." "I... I'm not scared of _you_," Mehlani points out shyly. This elicits a nod; he'd decided that on his own, but it's nice to have confirmation. "No..." Jorenan agrees. "It's ... -this- that you're afraid of." He steps close, and catches Mehlani's hands (reins and all) in his own. He stands close, looking down at her, and then brings the fingers of one of those hands to his lips. Nightsong whickers, tossing her head at the odd activity so close to her head. Mehlani, however, doesn't seem to notice. Involuntarily, her lips part as if in mimicry of Jorenan's, and she gasps a little at the touch to her fingers. She manages only a mute nod in reply. His lips linger on one finger, as if tasting the sweetest fruit. Then he bends, or leans, or something. It's hard to figure out exactly what, but his lips meet hers in the lightest, lingering touch imaginable. "And of this," he whispers in her ear. 'Lani's eyes flutter shut, and Nightsong, trying to figure out what the humans are doing, swivels her black nose around and attempts to interpose it in between the young man and the young maiden; if there's touching going on, as far as Nightsong is concerned, it should involve her muzzle, preferably with a brush. Still, Mehlani doesn't notice, as she manages to whisper, "Y-yes..." Her soft voice has roughened, her throat gone dry. Since Jorenann's got the reins as firmly as Mehlani does at this point, he can pretty easily pull the runner's head. Not that she'll necessarily do what he wants her to do. In the meantime, his other hand still has both of hers, and is holding them to his chest. His lips meet her neck again, the touch both gentle and electrifying. "And... this too, you're afraid of." he says quietly. Nightsong lets out a surprised whicker, taken aback enough that Jorenan can get her head out of the way, and the motion pulls the reins from Mehlani's fingers. Those fingers flutter now in the Journeyman's grasp, and so does her pulse in her throat, as she gives another shaky little nod. Nightsongs reins get wrapped around Jorenan's fist to make them a little more secure, but really his concentration is on other things. The flutter in the fingers reminds him of something, perhaps, for his hand (and hers with it) go down towards her belly. "And here," he says, "there are flits diving and dancing, demanding to be set free." "Y... yes... how....." Mehlani trails off, her voice still small and breathless. Then she manages to finish, "... do you know....?" Doh! She wasn't supposed to ask that. There is a pause, wherein Jorenan thinks fast. Of course, he's also still nuzzling Mehlani's neck, but he's pretty sure that's not going to be a distraction. Which way to tell it, hmmm. Finally, he says, "Because I feel them, too." There, that's about right. Mehlani breathes, "You do...?" Her head tilts a little; indeed, that gentle nuzzling to her neck is distracting the lass, for she seems unable to speak above that barely audible murmur. Her hands shiver within Jorenan's grasp, her fingertips brushing tentative and soft against his chest. His hand loosens, since Mehlani seems to want her hands free for other things for the moment, and Jorenan nods very slightly. "Aye," he breathes quietly, his breath warming a part of her neck. "A positive panic, they're in. Like ... like they've forgotten how to between and they're in a dark place alone." Hmmm. Not the best analogy, but then again, he's busy. His lips brush against her earlobe. Mehlani's fingers, however, seem unable to leave their immediate vicinity; they flutter a moment, perhaps not unlike the theoretical fire lizards of which the Baker is murmuring into her ear. She finally places them, palms and fingertips down, right against his chest... meaning to support herself, for she's not entirely sure of her ability to stand. Her eyes are still closed, and she whispers a tiny answer of, "Y-yes... like that..." He doesn't mind the pressure in the least; he seems to enjoy it, in fact. His free arm slides around behind her, the better to hold her up. He starts to move the other hand, and recalls Nightsong's presence. "Well then, lass," his deep voice rumbles. "We'll just have to calm them down. And have a chat over it all. And I'll wager Nightsong'd like the stables, too." When did Jorenan's voice acquire that deep, husky timbre? fleetingly wonders Mehlani. She manages to lift her gaze up and up to find his face, eyes wide in nervous fascination, her lips slightly pursed. Then she whispers, "Yes...I...I should put her away..." The thought of the horse seems to distract her again, but differently this time, as her gaze falters sideways to the creature's increasingly impatient ebon regard. Jorenan leaves his arm comfortably around Mehlani's waist and turns to lead her and Nightsong into the stables. "-We- should," he says firmly. Who knows? His voice has always been deep, but the resonance does seem to hvae changed some. "A-alright," whispers Mehlani shyly. She lets Jorenan guide her, though concern for Nightsong reminds her to reach out a hand for the mare's reins. Finding that hand to be shaking, she grabs a little unsteadily at the long leather leads; for her part, the mare merely snorts in satisfaction, as heading to the stable means 1) brushing, and 2) food. Jorenan heads southeast into the Beast Hold. Jorenan has left. You head southeast into the Beast Hold. Telgar Beasthold Contents: Jorenan Nightsong(#15918Jbe) Fuzzy Obvious exits: Pasture Nightsong seems to be in the lead on this one, for it's an easy thing to end up at her stall. Jorenan lets the reins go as it becomes clear she's not going anywhere else. "Let's make quick work of getting Nightsong settled, eh? I'll get her tack off, and you feed her, and then we'll both brush?" This is more familiar territory, and it settles Mehlani somewhat, though those suspicious flutters still linger in her belly. She gives forth a silent nod, stepping away slowly to check her runner's feed bin, and then to fetch some fresh oats to fill it, and water as well. The lingering touch of his hand suggests that Jorenan didn't really want to let go, but he does, and then he removes Nightsong's tack with a fair hand, if slightly out of practice. He hangs it on the most obviously empty pegs, and brings a pair of brushes from where they're put away. Nightsong walks readily enough into her stall, her nose already seeking out the water that Mehlani's poured. The brushes, however, catch more of her attention. They catch Mehlani's as well, as the girl returns shadow-quiet to Jorenan's side, closing her hand around one brush, and then turning her attention to the mare. He lets the brush go, but not so easily does Jorenan let Mehlani step away again. His arms go around her waist as she turns away, and he gives her a gently teasing squeeze. While he's got her there, he breathes in the scent of her hair. "W... we have to brush her," murmurs Mehlani, startled as those arms slip round her. She turns automatically in Jorenan's grasp, her unsettled features questioning, and once more blushing. The ever-present, sometimes-annoying, usually-pleasant hat appears not to like this treatment; it gets knocked askew and into a downright peculiar position. So Jorenan reaches up and removes it entirely. "Yes," he agrees, "we do. But I like hugging you, so I did. I'm going to keep doing it until you stop jumping in terror every time, too." He gives her a gentle kiss to seal the promise, and then lets her go so that they can, in fact, give Nightsong the brushing she deserves. Mehlani seems to forget to breathe for a few moments, and her gaze shyly plummets downward... then flickers up again in confusion as she's released. Nightsong reaches over and nudges her peremptorily, distracting her enough to recall her own claim of brushing that must be done. And thus, she turns towards the mare. Hatless, her head is crowned only in her auburn tresses, a few of them falling forward over her brow. It may be that Jorenan really never noticed the color of Mehlani's hair before, as its' always been covered with hat. He seems entirely taken with what he's seeing, though, and only reluctantly turns to Nightsong. Then he focuses his attention on her, though, and gives her the brushing she deserves. The mare whinnies in satisfaction, her silken tail whishing back and forth. Mehlani keeps her gaze demurely lowered, her hands working with tender care along the runner's raven coat. Her motions, though, are ever so slightly off-kilter; it's obvious the lass is still unsettled. Jorenan gives Nightsong a grin, and then goes on with his grooming. As he reaches the completion of the project, he works his way around so that he's on the same side of Nightson g as Mehlani again. Brushing a mare doesn't take nearly as long as washing a dragon... and Mehlani's mind is awhirl, so the passage of time is not within her immediate ken. It seems all too sudden to her when she turns to find Jorenan... right there. She stops, looking up with wide blue eyes, her hand with the brush it holds slipping half-noticed from Nightsong's flank. Giving Mehlani a moment to collect her wits is probably futile, or so Jorenan has found in the past. So he just takes her hand and leads her to the hayloft. The brushes end up where they're suppsed to go, somehow, without anyone really paying attention. "J-Jorenan... what're..." Before she finishes the question, Mehlani trails off -- timid and shy she might be, she's kissed and been kissed enough times to suspect what the young man might have in mind. Still, her heart in her throat, she follows in his wake, her fingers fluttering in his once more. He's got that idea or something awfully close, yep! Once they're safely tucked away in the corner of the hayloft with those old runner blankets, though, Jorenan just pulls her down to sit next to him for a moment. Sitting... sitting is good. Mehlani's slender form seems to more sink down of its own accord than obey any active command of hers to sit, though; her legs fold up gracefully beneath her, and she seems unable to look up into Jorenan's face for more than a few seconds at a time. After a pause, Jorenan leans back on his elbows and looks at Mehlani. "What'll help?" he asks. It might be he's asking her, or it might be that he's asking his own private oracle. "You... you want... to kiss me, don't you...?" Mehlani whispers around the lump in her throat. It feels odd to her to ask -- she's never had to ask either E'rian or K'star -- but with the way her pulse is fluttering, it seems suddenly wise to establish what her companion desires. Then she'll work on things like what _she_ desires.... There's a question that's got a plain as day answer, but Jorenan just grins. "Well...." he finally says, "I wouldn't mind it. And I do think you want to kiss me as well." Her blue gaze drops again; Mehlani seems fascinated by her own hands all of a sudden. She starts to breathe a reply, but is unable to, and finally nods again. The tiny motion makes those loose tendrils of hair along her brow bob ever so slightly. He breaths out, and then smiles at Mehlani, even if she can't see it. She'll hear it in his voice. "Well then, love, why're you all the way over there? You could at least come and hold my hand." Mehlani smiles hesitantly, and peeks up again, first at Jorenan's hand... which she grasps... and then up to his face. He nods. "See now," he says, giving her hand a squeeze, "the touch, that's what's important. It's not the .... the attraction part. It's the touch. Skin against skin." He meets her eyes when she looks up, and that smile is still there. "You don't have to fear -that- anyway. You can curl up next to me if you want to, too." 'Lani considers this, and hesitantly scoots over across the hay, drawing nearer to the young man. Her mouth curls up momentarily on each end, and her fingers squeeze Jorenan's in reply. "See now, that feels good, eh?" Jorena shifts some, too, so that they're hip to hip, though not both facing the same way. "Are you still scared of just touching?" "It's... not just touching," murmurs Mehlani softly, her gaze resting on their interlocked hands. "It's..." And again she trails off, a slight swallow coursing along her throat. He waits, and when more information isn't forthcoming, asks, "It's what?" The hand that's not holding Mehlani's comes up to rub her back slowly. "It's..." That escapes Mehlani in another barely detectable whisper. She wets her lips, and then continues on, hesitantly lifting her free hand to touch his chest once more. Still, her gaze rests on her held hand. "...what... it feels like." Oh dear. That didn't make too much sense, did it? Actually, it makes completely sensible sense. "Aye," he says quietly, continuing to rub Mehlani's back. "Like every little hair on your skin is alive. And... more, too." He falls silent, then, and curls a little closer to her, so that he can lean his head against hers. "Yes," whispers Mehlani, her voice not carrying far, but then, it doesn't need to. Her breath brushes feather-light against him. Inwardly, she tells herself that it's as if all four of her greens have gone proddy... and _that_ thought makes her go scarlet. He just keeps rubbing her back, for all that he'd love to do something more appropriate to a bronze after a lovely green. But he doesn't; he's not a dragon nor a 'lizard, after all. "There is no harm," he says. "in feeling something new. There is no harm in feeling something intensely good. There is no harm in it at all." "I know," murmurs Mehlani, her breath drawn in long and slow... and then, tentative as a foal being coaxed out to inspect an offered handful of grains, she draws closer to Jorenan, to lay her head on his shoulder. She curls her arms around him, and adds softly, "I trust you...!" Well. If that's not enough to scare the most iron-clad of souls, it's hard to say what is. And JOrenan's soul is clad more in Late Bathrobe style than anything else. Nevertheless, his arms go around Mehlani in their turn. "Well now," he says, his voice taking on a quiet pride. "That's a fine thing to know. Thank you." "You're welcome," is 'Lani's whispered reply. She pulls in another soft breath, and then lifts her head, very close to Jorenan's own, her eyes lifting to his face. The proximity is a heady thing; Jorenan's pulse is beginning to race. Not that anyone would necessarily know that, but one might notice a sudden glaze to the eyes and a stillness in him. He's lost in her eyes, of a suddenment, lost. Up close, those eyes of Mehlani's are truly enormous, and blue, blue, blue, summer-sky and sea-wave blue, twilight and noontime all in dappled layers. Her eyes meeting Jorenan's own, she lifts a hand, fingertips timidly extended, reaching for his cheek; when her fingers connect, her hand simply pauses there a moment, like a fire lizard who's momentarily alighted on a perch. Well, that would certainly explain the lostness. He's stil trying to figure out where he's seen all those colors and why he never noticed each any every one of them before when her fingers connect with his cheek. At the touch, the spell is lifted a little, and his eyes close as he runs a clean-shaven jaw against her hand. 'Lani's fingers trace along the line of that jaw, and up again along the plane of the young man's cheek. Only a moment, and then her other hand has joined the first, mirroring the actions of its mate. All the while, the lass is silent, her fingertips quivering ever so slightly as they explore their paths. He keeps still, at a cost. His eyes come open again, and hhe watches her expression as she investigates. There is a quit openness about him, as if some thin covering had been removed. Her hands wind up cupping Jorenan's face between them, the barest of connections between her palms and his cheeks. And if the youth now wears an openness about him, the girl seems to drink it in, that fathomless blue gaze gone searching, knowing, aware. Feeling compelled to study him, to take in the tan of his skin, the brown of his eyes, each detail of the face before her, Mehlani does exactly that... and at last, draws herself up slow and shy to connect her lips to his, with the same delicate contact given forth by her hands. He stopped breathing somewhere in the midst of it all, and the kiss makes him decide that he really never wanted to breathe in teh first place, anyway. The touch of Mehlani's hands against his cheeks and her lips against his, though, is enough to shock the breathing into motion again; an exhalation of breath that holds ... something in it. Something deep. And now, Mehlani's started quivering all over again. She draws back, but only a breath's distance away, stricken shy, unsure. This is the time for Jorenan to say something kind, or intelligent, or pretty much anything at all. It takes a minute. Let's see. What would it be he might say? Tsk. A mind is a terrible thing to lose. Finally, the faintest glimmering of a thought appears in his head, and he manages to express it. "I trust you, too." The voice is somewhat faint, and not at all steady. But it's there. A ghost of a nod, and then, Mehlani's arms are around Jorenan again, her hug swift and sure, even as her face buries in his shoulder again. "I... don't know what... I want," she whispers. No, that's wrong. You do know what you want, don't you, 'Lani lass? And somewhere out there there's a dragon rising... though you can hardly guess where Lysseth's induced sensations end and your own begin, can you? "H... hold me, Jorenan?" Perhaps a little of the internal conflict of wants and fears comes through in Mehlani's voice, for Jorenan's arms go around her in a comforting embrace. But perhaps it doesn't answer the conflicts, for it also brings two bodies closer together, where one can hear the breathing of the other, where one can smell the scent of the other. There's the tiniest of sounds, Mehlani's breath catching in her throat. She's so small against Jorenan's chest, practically buried in the circle of his arms, that all she can really perceive now is... Jorenan. She's shivering more, as she first rubs her cheek along his broad shoulder, and then she catches herself. Her voice comes out strained and as husky as her clear tones ever get, as she breathes, "I... I don't know if I should yet... I..." The fingers that come up to shush Mehlani are gentle, and linger on her lips for a long moment. Jorenan is silent for a moment, and then says, "Should or should not is... not important." Somewhere, or is it just in his head? the roar of a dragon passes through the audible range. He just holds her there, safe in the encirclement of his arms. But against his chest like that, she'll have to hear his heart, or feel it, thumping against his breastbone... She can, indeed, sense that pulsing; it almost overshadows her own heart's thudding. Only in the circle of those arms about her does she feel safe enough, though it simultaneously pains her to admit, "I-I haven't... talked to Kes yet...!" The mention of K'star brings none of the usual responses one might expect at the mention of a rival. Perhaps, at this moment, h's not a rival, but just a fellow traveller. "K'star," Jorenan says quietly, "is a rider and a gentleman. What you do will not change how he feels." Is Mehlani surprised at that response? Perhaps, for she looks up, blinking, those blueblue eyes of hers once more seeking Jorenan's face. The eyes that meet Mehlani's have the clarity of certainty. Perhaps it's a certainty that will look foolish in the morning. But for now, Jorenan's sure. "K'star will understand," he repeats firmly, "whatever you choose to do." "And you?" Mehlani whispers. "I," he says honestly, "respect you already. Why should that change?" That's said in the sort mystified voice one uses when one simply doesn't understand anything dto do with other opinions on the matter. Mehlani swallows a little, fear and shyness and something beginning to blossom into longing all intermingling in her face. Her mouth's ends curl up for a moment, as she whispers, "Th-this isn't helping the flits down there...." "Mmm," says Jorenan thoughtfully. "I should take you to a healer to have that taken care of." He slides a hand down to her stomach and begins rubbing; perhaps that will help. One way or another. [We never finished this scene, but it is assumed that a serious smoochfest likely commenced in the hayloft while Jorenan and Mehlani yielded at least somewhat to dragon-induced urges! End log...]